A fulmar on Long Strand Beach

At the far end of the beach, I found a washed up fulmar which at first glance appeared to be dead.  He opened and closed his bill when he saw me but could not move.  I picked him up and carried him as there were dogs on the beach.  As I walked I gave him reiki.  At first he seemed very ill at ease and held his head out at an awkward angle.  After a few minutes I saw him looking up at me with those clear black eyes.  Now he looked different.  He had surrendered.  He could feel my warmth and the energy and he relaxed.  He settled his head into normal position.  Another few minutes later, I saw his eyes had closed and knew he had died.

I love these birds that have accompanied me so many times on my watches at sea.  This is the first time I held one.  He has that lovely musty petrel smell.  I feel his energy around me, feel the place on my chest where I held him when walking.  I am glad I was able to be there with him and keep the dogs away.  I am saddened and yet enriched.  I sat in the Dunes and started writing…

Sometimes we are caught up in the storm of our lives.
We become helpless and are swept along with currents
And at some stage end up washed up on the beach.

And there we lie, barely conscious, unable to move
Or do anything to help ourselves.
It is only then, we may find the point of surrender.

On the one hand defeated, but on the other,
We finally decide to flow with life
Or if death is calling us, we will go that way too.

Although physically and emotionally spent,
For the first time maybe, there is a space,
A breath, an allowing of what is.

We are finished fighting, struggling & resisting what is.
And now, at our lowest point,
Ironically we are flowing with life.

We may gain clarity of what’s important,
What it is we really wanted all along.
What if we could do this without going to the brink of our lives?
What would life be like then?